Don't Make Lilly's Big Mistake

My friend Lilly didn’t like to admit it
when she was wrong. Her reluctance to do
so was distancing her from her husband;
they were fighting more often and didn’t
act like friends any more. Lilly wanted to
be right – even at the expense of her
relationships.

Lilly was ashamed to be wrong, even though
she knew, logically, that her loved ones
didn’t expect her to be perfect. When she
looked closely at herself, in fact, the
only person who held unrealistic
expectations for Lilly was…Lilly. And once
you paint yourself into a corner with
unrealistic expectations it starts to seem
impossible to get out.

Once you’ve adopted a façade of perfection
you then must protect it at all costs. After
all, the very reason you think you
need to be perfect is that you don’t
believe others will find you worthy if they
only knew the real you. Which, of course,
translates into: you don’t feel you are
worthy.

So your mask of perfection becomes a suit
of armor, so to speak, for your fragile
self-image. And the more you portray
perfectionism to sooth your low self-
esteem, the more dependant upon it you
become. After all, your friends and family
love you and accept you – but they love and
accept the perfect person you have been
showing them.

Not the fallible human being you really are.

Unfortunately, nothing distances you from
other people like perfectionism. Your lack
of humility keeps others at arms length,
distancing you from the emotional intimacy
so necessary to use your humor nature. And,
ironically, portraying the mask of
perfectionism doesn’t even work – it only
shines a spotlight upon your low self-
esteem.

For these reasons, I have created a Fun
Commandment to make sure you are never so
isolated from other people: Admit When
You’re Wrong. Even if you can’t relate
with Lilly because your self-esteem is high
enough to be vulnerable, you will still
enjoy this strategy. Admitting you’re
wrong is, you’ll find, so fun and freeing
that you’ll actually start looking for
opportunities to do it.

In two weeks, I'll teach you how to use
this Fun Commandment to bring your
relationships closer than you thought
possible. Until then...keep smiling!

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Relationships have confounded us since the
beginning of time. But they don't have to
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natural medicine will give you the
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are!

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Cliff Kuhn, M.D.
The Laugh Doctor
7406 Wesboro Road
Louisville, KY 40242
"It all starts with a SMILE"